Goodbye

I begin 2010 heavy-hearted and reflective of 2009.
As I posted on Dec. 14th my Grandfather passed away. He was an amazing man who fought for every day of life and every last breath. We honored and laid him to rest Dec. 22nd sad to say goodbye but knew that at last after two years of fight he would once again be spending Christmas and eternity with Grandma.
On Dec. 26th my father, my hero passed suddenly and peacefully away. Leaving us heavy, shocked and confused. He had only been admitted to the hospital on Christmas morning and as so many times in the past we thought he would simply recover and come home to us. My husband woke me to tell me of his passing and that they would hold his body for us to go say our goodbyes. I will tell you saying goodbye to the physical body is far different than saying goodbye to the spirit. I continued to touch him to make sure it was real. On Wed. Dec. 30th we said our final farewells and celebrated a life well-lived and a man truly loved by all who knew him. The local paper ran an article honoring him and his work in the community.


Rehabilitation specialist called John E. Ottens Jr. "the voice of conscience" regarding people with disabilities.
People often called Ottens when someone in the La Crosse area needed help with independent living and other disability issues, as he had the ear of politicians and city, county and state government officials.
Ottens, who died Saturday at age 54, didn't let his own disability - a drunken driver rammed into his car more than 30 years ago, leaving him a quadriplegic - get in the way of his advocacy for disability rights and stronger laws and recognition of the consequences of alcohol and driving.
"When John made up his mind and an issue was near and dear to his heart, he spoke out for those who didn't have a voice, and it didn't matter if it was politically correct or not," said Cheryl Ottens, his wife of 14 years.
"He pulled a lot of people in, including me, to become politically involved, and that was infectious," she said. "With him gone, a voice is missing."
Cheryl Ottens, herself paralyzed in a motorcycle accident, said her husband was hospitalized Christmas Day with pneumonia, which he's had many times before.
"But this time, I think the muscles around his lungs just gave out," Ottens said. "I admired his strength and his ability to look at the big picture, not just his issues. He helped a lot of people."
Kathie Knoble-Iverson, director of Independent Living Resources in La Crosse, said Ottens was instrumental in forming an independent living center to help people with disabilities stay in their own homes.
"He was a huge advocate for community-directed services," Knoble-Iverson said. "He always was very direct, and I appreciated his drive. He was committed to independent living.
"His philosophy was, ‘I know how to run my life, and I can manage the people who take care of me,'" she said.
Brayer Amble, a social worker in the La Crosse County Justice Sanctions program, said Ottens spoke to convicted drunken drivers for 10 years as part of the victim impact panel. Ottens also talked to students and the community about the consequences of driving impaired.
"He really had a lot of heart," Amble said. "He contributed mightily to a change in people's attitude toward drinking and driving."
Ottens would not have lived as long had he been in a nursing home, Knoble-Iverson said. "He created his own environment to meet his needs," she said. "His parents did everything to keep him in the community."
His father, John Ottens Sr., died just 12 days before his son.